I forget you are only two

We came back at 2pm from church, I showered you and gave you your bottle. I put you down for your nap and expected you to fall asleep as soon as possible, only to find you came out of the room 15 mins later telling me "I want to pee". You have just peed before shower and I have put you on diaper for nap. I brought you to the potty and sent you back to bed again, 15 mins later you came out and wanted to pee again. I brought you to the potty again and nothing came out by the way. I then went in to lie down with you to make sure you sleep. For half an hour or so I dozed on and off while humming a lullaby, you were still playing with your soft toy, your pillow, your bolster and even attempted to make a conversation with me. I was furious. I took away all the things on the bed and shouted at you to close your eyes and sleep. I expected you to lie down even though you don't feel like sleeping. I forgot you are only two.

After you woke up from your nap, we lay down on the bed and I was reading you a book -  a poem book. Your little hands just couldn't do nothing for a moment and they kept coming to me to grab the book despite me telling you many times "Let me read to you". I was so frustrated I pushed your hands away, with a strong force. If it is a picture book I will let you read together with me like we always do in the evening, but I told you this is not a picture book. When I said "Let me read to you", I expect you to be still and listen. I forgot you are only two.

I was cooking dinner in the kitchen. I asked you to stay in the living room and play with your toys. You still wandered around in the kitchen and at times even asked me to carry you. How could I carry you when both my hands are busy? And didn't I tell you many times it is dangerous to play in the kitchen when I am cooking? I grabbed your arms and dragged you to the living room and my anger was all shown on my face. I forgot you are only two.

Dinner was served. You finished 80% of your food and then started to play with the remaining. You finished all your food yesterday and the day before yesterday, I expected you to only do better. And didn't I tell you not to play with your food? Do you know how many children in African are suffering from hunger? I snatched the bowl away from you and ignored all your requests thereafter. I forgot you are only two.

It was shower time. I took off all your clothes at the bathroom entrance and instead of coming in, you ran all over the house with your naked body. It was already 8pm and bedtime would be delayed again if we don't hurry, plus nobody runs about naked even in their own house. I forgot they told me two-year-olds do. I forgot you are only two.

......

Yes these are all very important - be attentive, listen and obey instructions, have self-control, know your manners, but I forget that you are only two, you are still work-in-progress. If you have become a master of all these by two I would be out of job now. I forget that good values are not just taught, but also modelled. I forget that you have just started school, you need more love, more attention and move assurance from me. I forget that discipline works hand-in-hand with love. I forget that even though I am 29 I am still work-in-progress, I still have a lot to learn, to be patient, to control my anger, my voice and my tone.

Someone reminds me again tomorrow, that she is only two.