Thursday 30 May 2013

Let's go to school today!

Kah Yen has been dawdling in the mornings and saying things like "I don't want to go to school today". We aren't sure if there are other reasons but what I can think of is her not getting enough sleep at night. She is sleeping for 10 hours only as comparing to 11+ hours before she attends school. On top of it she's also waking up at least once for toilet trip.

To make her feel better in the morning, Daddy drew this picture for her after she went to bed last night. Hopefully she will be excited to go to school when she sees this.  I love how it goes to show that Daddy loves her very very much.


Wednesday 29 May 2013

City Girl

Despite my strong belief that childhood should be spent on the outdoors, gettting dirty by digging holes in the garden, hunting leaves in the woods, jumpping in a puddle barefooted, playing with mud and sand and stones, walking on grass and balancing on log...... I found it quite impossible to create such a childhood in urban Singapore, to replicate my own childhood in China for my daughter. I have come to discover that Singapore has inevitably produced a city girl in my daughter.

When we were travelling around Bali for the past week, there were a few occasions we can't find a decent toilet with the standard toilet bowl. They are the squat-down type, and the floor is generally wet. My daughter, whenever we were going to pee and I opened the door of such a toilet, she would shake her head "No, I don't want to go pee pee. It's so smelly! No, I don't need to pee pee." And magically, she can hold her urine for another two hours, which never happens when we are in Singapore.

And when we brought her to the beach to play sand, she refused to sit on the sand, and everytime her hand touches the sand, she'd spend the next two minutes shaking and clapping to get rid of it. In order to get her to enjoy sand play, we two adults sat on the sand to get our hands and feet dirty and created all sorts of castles and minuatures. She just pretty much stood there as an observer.

Coming back to Singapore, I have determined to bring her outdoors more often. I believe nature is the best playground and also the best teacher. Staying in punggol gave us the advantage, we are closer to nature. So far, we brought her to the waterway every week, her favorite activity is to throw stones in the river. We brought her to the neighborhood park to hunt for caterpillars, snails and spiders. We brought her to punggol jetty to feed fishes and turtles, and to get her hands and feet dirty on the beach.

She is getting acquainted to her new friend quite well I'd say, though she still insists on sitting on a mat and refuses to walk near the water.

(PS: I was holding an umbrella because it started drizzling, not because of the beach sun. No, I am not a city girl.)

Monday 27 May 2013

Milestone: Moving to a junior bed

Yesterday marked yet another important milestone for Kah Yen. At two and a half year old, she has transited from her baby cot to a junior bed.

The time is just right. I am 5 months pregnant now. We need the baby cot for the second baby eventually. But we can't move her just before the baby arrives, she will feel rejected or being displaced. In fact when we prepare her for the transition, we are very careful not to use the "We need the cot for your baby sibling" excuse but always say she is moving to a junior bed because she is a big girl now.

We felt she is also developmentally ready. She has always been falling asleep on her own in her baby cot. She never co-slept with us. The first one and a half year she shares a room with us but she sleeps on her own at 830pm. When we moved to our new house at the beginning of the year, she sleeps alone in her own room without a fuss. In fact she is very proud she has her own room. Just one week back we were in Bali for a whole week holiday,we stayed in a villa with two bedrooms, and she sleeps on a single bed in one of the rooms. She never got up and wandered around at night.

Another reason is always because she is starting to wake up at night to ask to go potty. We are not doing any nighttime potty training with her, she is still on diaper at night. But she seems to be able to hold her urine for hours at night and wake herself up when her bladder is full. It is becoming increasingly challenging for me at 5-month pregnant to carry her up and down the cot at night to bring her to potty. With a junior bed, we don't expect her to wake up and go to potty herself of course (when all the lights are off), but at least I don't need to carry her up and down.

So with all these in mind, we planned to purchase her junior bed last weekend. We try to make this whole transition a fanfare. Days before our shopping day, we have been telling her we are going to buy her a junior bed because she is now a big girl, and make it sound as excited as possible, and we can see her face light up. Then on the actual day, the first thing I did when I woke her in the morning is to remind her we are going IKEA today to buy her new bed. She is all like "Yeah! Let's go!".

While in IKEA, we let her try all the junior beds. Of course we have already in mind what model to buy, and we are not going to ask stupid questions like "Do you like this one or that one?" We will be the one making the final choice and purchase, we just want to get her all excited through the whole experience. At home, when Daddy is assembling her new bed, we also allow her to sit near by as a "little helper" with close supervision. She gets to pass some screws and nuts to Daddy.

When the new bed is finally ready, we make sure she is around to witness the moment of shifting the cot out and the new bed into her room. (We haven't bought the new sheet and blanket yet, otherwise we will let her help to make her new bedding too.) She is then invited to try her new bed. She happily jumped onto her new bed. We also asked her to select the soft toys she would like to sleep with her on her new bed, and she picked up them, lined them on bed and we had a "grand" photo taking ceremony.

The pictures speak more than a thousand words.




OF course we know fully well the transition is not just as simple as that. Now that she is in a bed, the new problem will be how to keep her in bed and out of trouble. Yesterday was the first night, we kept the same bedtime routine and settled her to bed. She came out once before falling asleep to go potty. After that, she was back to bed and soon asleep. She didn't wake up the whole night.

We will monitor for the next few days how it goes. If she refuses to stay in bed and starts wander around, we will have to establish some new rules with her. Though I really miss the convenience a confining baby cot brings when it comes to sleep, I look forward to going through this new phrase with her and seeing her grow to be a more independent and self-disciplined big girl.

Monday 20 May 2013

Kah Yen Quotables

I have found talking with 2-3 year olds can be hilarious sometimes. Here are some of the things Kah Yen has said. I want to record them all down before I forget.

(1) Miss Teh Kah Yen

We are reading a book together. There is a picture of a happy little girl on the page.

Me: Look! It is a little girl. She looks so happy. How about you Kah Yen? Are you a happy girl?
KY: I am not a girl. I am Miss Teh Kah Yen.


(2) It's a sunny day

We stayed in a two-bedroom villa during our one week holiday in Bali last week. Kah Yen slept on her own on a single bed in a separate room. It is lower than a normal bed so she can get up and down easily herself. We kept both bedroom doors open so we can hear her when she woke up.

I was dreaming when I heard footsteps in our bedroom. I opened my eyes. It's Kah Yen and the clock shows 7am.

Me: Kah Yen, it's only 7am! You woke up so early?
KY: It's a sunny day.

There goes my dream of catching back my one year short of sleep during this one week holiday.


(3) Old Macdonald

Me: Kah Yen, quick! Wear your shoes, we are going to Macdonald's to eat Pancake!
KY: Old Macdonald had a farm?

Yes, and we are going to eat the chicken on his farm too. I was almost gonna say.


(4) Timothy

 Kah Yen had two best friends in school. Their names are Timothy and Isabel. So this is what happened when I was reading her the children's bible the other day.

Me: Today's bible verse is from 1 Timothy. It is a letter written to Timothy.
KY: How about Isabel?
Me: ... ...

Someone please tell me how to answer her!

Thursday 9 May 2013

Mummy is happy!

We hardly use the word "sensible" on a two-year old child. The two are just not linked. How can a two-year old in any sense be sensible when they stand and dance on high chair during meal, run around the house naked when it is bedtime, spill water onto your carpet, draw pictures on your newly painted walls, and throw into a fist when you are leaving the shopping mall without him/her taking a kiddy ride? ... Well, you know what I mean and you know the list can go longer and longer.

But, there are times when your two-year old is behaving almost like a grown-up, and it is usually right after you have lost control of yourself and let go on him/her, and it almost instantly make you feel like you are the WORST mum ever ... Well, I just had such a moment.

It was Sunday, after church and lunch, we were finally back home at 2pm. I managed to put her to bed 30 minutes later after a quick shower and a bottle. She was expected to take a nap. However, half an hour later, I peeked into her room, she was playing with her soft toys. One hour later, I peeked again and she was still playing.

This has been happening quite often during weekends. The battle to get her to nap has been both frustrating and exhausting.

Hence, when I peeked in the third time and found she was still playing, I dashed into the room. I was angry on my face and in my tone. "Kah Yen, you are supposed to sleep, not play!' I shouted. And I removed all her soft toys from her bed to the carpet. She was stunned initially, and then started to cry when she saw her soft toys been thrown onto the floor. I stared at her with a stern face for a good two minutes. I then gave her only one soft toy - her Baby Pooh, and ordered her to lie down and sleep.

Part of me wants her to sleep because I care for her, the other part of me wishes her to sleep so that I can have my peaceful afternoon, so that I can even take a nap myself. That part of me was selfish. I know.

Five minutes later, I opened her room again just to check she was alright after my outburst. I saw she was lying down quietly on her bed, her eyes are still wide open though, she didn't look lie she was sleepy at all.

She saw me in. She turned her head and said:

"No more playing with soft toys, Okay?"

"Yes, that's right, it's your nap time." My voice was much softer.

"Must lie down and sleep, Okay?" She said again.

"Yes." I stroked her hair, and smiled gently.

"Mummy is happy!" She exclaimed and smiled at me.

I wanted to say something but my throat was blocked. My 2.5-year old, after I have just yelled at her, was lying down quietly so that mummy will not be angry anymore, but be happy. That seems to concern her more than anything.

I remembered all the times when I have yelled at her and been impatient with her, I wonder how much I must have frightened her, how disturbed her little soul must be seeing her causing me to be angry. And how shamefully I am for showing her the ugly side of her mummy - when to her pure and innocent mind, the word "mummy" means "love", and nothing else.

I left the room with a mixed feeling of guilt and warmth.

I will do better next time. I know.

Friday 3 May 2013

Favorite

Kah Yen is gettting more and more expressive by the day. I am not talking about "I want to drink milk, now!" or "Can I play some more, please?" or "I don't want to go to sleep, I want to wake up!"... I am talking about this.

Last night when she came back home from school, she saw her Baby Pooh on our bed, left there by her in the morning. She climbed up to our bed, hugged Baby Pooh to her chest, and said "Hello Ah Pooh. This is my Ah Pooh. I love Ah Pooh. This is my favorite Ah Pooh." I stood there watching in amusement.

Well technically it is not correct. She only has one Ah Pooh. So it cannot be her favorite Ah Pooh. But hey! she is only two and a half year old and she is using the word "favorite", that means more to me than a grammatically correct sentence.

I love to see she is becoming more affectionate as she grows. Just on Labor day, we had a fun morning on the beach and I was expecting her to take a long nap in the afternoon but she didn't sleep. I was tired myself so I let her play in my room while I took a quick nap. She played on her own for a long time, while I dozed on and off half sleeping half feeling guilty of leaving her alone. In the midst of all this I felt her climbed up to my bed, snugged herself tightly beside me, and out of nowhere she just said "Mummy, I like you."

It made me smile but I was also nearly choked to death by the guilt.

I am totally not surprised if one day she comes to me and says "You are my favorite mummy". It sounds awkward I know, but you and me know what that means.